Random Thoughts + 19th Birthday!

I was talking to one of my best friends today about this guy my friends "claim" likes me. I say claim because he has not told me yet, he only told people that he knew would tell me and I am past the stage of believing 'dem-say, dem-say story'. But besides that, I think he just likes the IDEA of liking me. Like he wouldn't mind having something with me because of the possible benefits...
Anyway, that's not the point.
The point is, my friend said I should not get into anything serious until I actually see qualities in him that I like, besides his dimples [I AM A SUCKER FOR DIMPLES -- it is actually pretty bad!]

This got me thinking a little bit. For most of Summer break and particularly this semester, I have kind of retreated. I almost never talk on the phone except it is to my family members, my friend that goes to school with me or my friend in New York; I chat on skype but only with specific people, and I don't BBM as often as before.

What am I doing with all this time? SLEEPING! Lol, okay jk. I am using this time to figure out who I am. Most of the time I am just reading and not necessarily my school books, but articles, essays and things like that or I am listening to a Gospel song and humming along. But majority of the time I am thinking. I think a lot, sometimes a bit too much and this can be a bad thing because when I get into one of those moods I think about everything and anything. The highs and the lows in my life.
I turned 19 on Wednesday and from here on, I am trying to map out what to do with my life. Trying to figure out who I am and figure out which friends pull me up and which ones bring me down. Trying to figure out which guys are worth 2 hours of phone battery power after midnight and which ones really just want to get 'some'.
This is all a work in progress because sometimes I think I have things all figured out then something suddenly happens and slaps me in the face.

This semester I have focused on calling my little sister and brother back in Nigeria more often, and on spending more time on the phone with my mother.
I have focused on cooking for my brother more often and going home solely to clean up the kitchen that I know, in true bachelor lifestyle, he has left a mess.
I have focused more on spending less and less time 'chasing friends'. Those that want me will find me.
I have focused more on just sitting and watching. Doesn't mean I do not have an opinion, but I really don't have the energy to get into an argument with anyone. You do you and watch me do me.
I have focused on telling the Trinity about my love...even though I don't always show it! *Lurve you audience of One :D*

I know this blog post is a tad bit disjointed, but somethings happened today, infact a bunch of stuff have happened since my 19th birthday last Wednesday and I was about to get into one of those thinking modes.
Instead of letting that come on me and subsequently spending an hour or two in self-pity, I decided to write.

I hope the first 10 months of your year have been as fruitful as you'd hoped. If not, the year is not over yet!
I also hope that everyday, every week you get closer to figuring out what you want from life and what you want from other people, but you cannot know this without knowing who you are.
So take some time to examine yourself. Your strengths and weaknesses; the areas that need tweaking and the parts you need to brush up on for the rest of the World to see...
Tell Jesus where you want to go and what you want to be -- then step out of your comfort zone, let go, flap your wings a little bit, and watch Him be the wind behind your wings!

xxx's and Jesus loves you!